Sunday, October 31, 2010

COCK TALES 4 - As Flat As A 40cm Penis

Scotty and Anna have upgraded from jelly beans to snakes. Scott is upset by Lady Gaga and Anna is entertained by female prisoners. And, of course, they speak about a 40cm penis.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Episode Three: Back to Two.


Scotty and Anna mourn the loss of Rohan, discuss fatties having sex and reveal their greatest (shared) passion... they go to _____land... where could it be? Have a listen to find out!

Or stream it here:

And if you want to get involved in the show, nominate a Legend of the Week or tell us something crazy. Send all questions, comments and complaints to:

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Cheap Whores.

We know we sound like cheap whores... but seriously, buy our shit.

If people buy our merch, we'll start producing more of it. Which is cool.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Squelch... Nothing Like a Bit of Feedback.

Squelch... Nothing Like a Bit of Feedback.

All of us at COCK TALES are totally self-conscious and completely para (and not in the alcoholic-good way).

So, as afraid as we might be to ask... we wanna know what you think of the show?
Any questions, comments or complaints? Possibly even a compliment?

PLEASE, for the sake of our sanity, please let us know by commenting below or by emailing us

Who know... you might even end up on the show if you like!

Monday, October 18, 2010

Are You An Anna Fan?

Everyone at COCK TALES is an Anna fan. After all, she is the woman who said "funny sex stories are funny"... and there's nothing funnier than Anna's fish-slap-story.

So, in celebration of "The Week of Anna" (that was supposed to happen in Episode Two but never really did), we've created a line of t-shirts!!!

Yes, you can now own your very own "I like it fishy" t-shirt!!!!!

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Sloppy Seconds.

Here it is, COCK TALES - Episode 2... come get some aural.

Let us know your thoughts! Comment below!

And do us a favour, tweet the link and spread our seed/love!!!

Friday, October 15, 2010

Tat Time.

No, we're not talking about the faux-lesbian singers, t.A.T.u.

We're talking about ink on the body, a real proper tattoo.
It was a tattoo that brought COCK TALES closer to Bug Hall. 
But it's a tattoo that started to tear the team apart last night.

Whilst recording episode two last night, Scotty suggested that someone should get a tattoo - but Anna and Rohan dismissed it very quickly.

But how fucking funny would it have been for one of them to get a tattoo like these...?
Let us know your thoughts! Post a comment with a tattoo suggestion or story!
Would you rather us just become faux-lesbians?

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Just to Explain.

Just to explain... because we crashed our server after the release of episode one, we had to buy new server space. Which we now have.

So there are a few ways you can now get COCK TALES.
  1. You can always stream the show here on our site. (BELOW)
  2. You can subscribe on iTunes. (CLICK HERE)
If you subscribed to our show before today, you need to subscribe to our new feed (because we've moved server, we've had to change all the programming crap).

The Trailer      
Episode One

We've Finally Made It... to iTunes.

That's right, after a bit of censorship... we've finally made it to iTunes!!!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Scientologists Can't Get Enough of COCK TALES.

It's true. We're almost 100% sure that Tom Cruise and John Travolta have both subscribed to the show.

Just now, we were playing around with the design of the blog and noticed a funny choice of advertisers...

How awesome that they like our little show!

Anyone For Tennis?

Scotty Star has decided to hijack the blog, his post is below...

So, the other day I was heading home and was waiting at the tram stop when I saw a comedian called Jason, who's one half of Anyone For Tennis. And I've spent the last half hour or so just listening to their clips.
They're fucking awesome, I remember seeing their Melbourne Comedy Festival show in 2008 and absolutely loving it. So, even though it has nothing to do with our podcast, I thought I'd post two of their funny videos on the blog for y'all to enjoy.


I find them hilarious. Check em out:
I love comedy and there's a lot of it going on in Melbourne, so I might try to post stuff from time to time... but we all know, honestly, that I'm pretty lazy and will probably forget to do it after I post this blog. Anyway, check out these guys and let us know what you think... if you like it, I'll try to post more and maybe try to get some comics on the podcast or something.

Twitter Bug.

Ok, so as you all should know by now, Scotty Star is a whore. Especially for low level celebrities.

You should have, by now, listened to episode one of the show... where Scott mentioned that Bug Hall had a penis tattoo and piercing (still allegedly, we think).
And then we wrote a blog... kinda slamming Bug... Scotty Star LOVES Bug Hall.

So we thought nothing of it when we tweeted Bug the day the first episode came out...

But then things got real. Bug Hall tweeted back...

This not only excited Scott... but the entire COCK TALES team.

But that was all for the public. Behind the scenes, Scott felt upset and betrayed... "How dare Anna steal my former-child-star-turned-pornographer man-crush?" he asked. 
(Yeah, we know how stupid that sounds, but that's just Scott for you.)

So, Scott has launched a new Twitter campaign. He wants to get Bug on the show to clarify where they stand. And where Bug and Anna stand... after all, it was Anna that called him a cunt on episode one of the pod.

So, we want you to join our Twitter campaign to help get this dire issue sorted, before it tears the COCK TALES team apart!!!

All you have to do is tweet the following:
"Hey @Bug_Hall, take a sip of glory on @cocktalespod!!!"

Monday, October 11, 2010

We're Such Unprofessional Tight Arses.


People have been BEGGING us to get a hold of the show. Noone is more upset than us thatour server crashed... But never fear!

Until 18 October 2010, you can download COCK TALES - Episode One here:

We know it's not the same, but give it a shot whilst we sort out everything on our end.

Hold Up.

Hi y'all,

We'd really like to thank everyone for downloading the first episode of the podcast!
We crashed our server after six hours!!!

We're trying to get things sorted, so please just hang in there... hopefully we can all bask in the glory (hole) of COCK TALES - A Highbrow Podcast soon!!!!!

Sunday, October 10, 2010

IT'S TIME... Episode One is Now Online!!!


That's right. It's time... for an aural experience so orgasmic that you'll be begging for more!!!

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Scotty Star LOVES Bug Hall.

It's true. Scott loves Bug Hall. In case you don't know who Bug Hall is (and, don't worry, we don't blame you)... he's the guy who played Alfalfa in the best movie of 1994, The Little Rascals.

But it broke Scott's lil heart the day Bug refused his friend add on Facebook. You'd be upset too.

Maybe he loves Bug a little less now... since he mentions (kinda bitterly) what Bug has been doing with his life post The Little Rascals in COCK TALES - Episode One.

So what's Bug been upto?
Check the links... if you love them as much as Scott does, let us know by commenting!


So, we launch the show tomorrow and here's a list of clues about a few topics we spoke about... (but they're probably NSFW)...
If you can figure out how they all come together, then you're even more fucked up than us!!!




Oh, the sad pains of rejection. We're not even an episode in, but we all know how it goes.

Friday morning, we received an email from the iTunes Store team informing us that COCK TALES - A Highbrow Podcast would not be included in the iTunes podcast directory. Fuckers. (Allegedly)

But the podcast will be made available here on the blog AND you can hit the "subscribe" button in the media player to subscribe to the podcast.


Thursday, October 7, 2010

The Day We Changed The World.

Is that overstating things? Probably.
Do we care? Not really.

This is just a quick note to let y'all that we're launching episode one this Sunday...
10 / 10 / 10.

Hence, this Sunday will be the DAY WE CHANGE THE WORLD!!!

In the mean time, hit us up on:

Otherwise, check back here on Sunday for the first episode!!!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Your First Taste...


Here it is, your first taste of COCK TALES - A Highbrow Podcast.


You might not know what the fuck the show is about, but it's still funny.


ps. the first episode will explain, you know, what the show's about.